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#081 - 3 words to transform conversations with your kids
A conversation tip from a veteran homeschool mom, why Gen Z is obsessed with aesthetics, plus a peek inside the "teacherless" Acton Academy model.
OpenEd Daily
November 20, 2024
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š” THOUGHT
āItās Like Having a Babyā
"When I first started homeschooling, there was that fear that I had to mimic a school schedule... Later I was like, āI don't need to do all this. I can be more relaxed.ā"
Starting a home-centered learning routine, Cassie Shepherd says, is like having a baby: As soon as you master nursing, they start eating solids, and everything changes. You can't stick to the manual because there isn't one.
Where she once attempted to follow a rigid school schedule, her kids now do math on the front porch. Her engineer-in-training builds all day. Her artist fills notebooks with drawings. Not because a curriculum demands it, but because that's how sheās discovered her children learn best.
š TREND
āAestheticoreā and the Teen Identity Crisis
On TikTok they call themselves "dark academia strawberry milk girls" and post videos of green juice at dawn. They create Pinterest boards of cottagecore aesthetics and call it identity. They are fifteen, sixteen, seventeen. They are searching.
An eye-opening essay by Emma Sloan, a 17-year-old homeschooled student, shines some much-needed light on why Generation Z seems obsessed with these aesthetic labels - from "dark academia" to "cottagecore" to "That Girl."
Sloanās argument isn't that Gen-Z has too many identities. It's that they're desperately looking for one that matters.
When young people are cut off from deeper traditions and thrust into standardized schooling, they'll grasp at superficial identities to feel unique. They'll build what Emma calls "philosophy castles in quicksand pits" - elaborate systems of meaning based on nothing but aesthetics and trends.
The solution isn't fewer identities. It's stronger ones. It's giving young people:
The freedom to explore deeply
Connection to wisdom across generations
Space to develop authentic interests
Real problems to solve
A foundation to build from
When you're truly becoming yourself, you don't need a Pinterest board to prove it.
š ļø TOOL
Three Magic Words: "Tell Me More"
Want to unlock deeper conversations with your kids? Stop asking "what" questions.
When your child is drawing, your instinct might be to ask "What's that?" But as Cassie Shepherd points out, specific questions often lead to dead-end answers. Instead, try these three words: "Tell me more."
Why it works:
Opens the conversation instead of closing it
Lets your child lead the story
Invites deeper sharing
Try it out and let us know how it goes!
(PEDAGOGY) OF THE DAY
Acton Academy: "Each Person Who Enters Here Is a Hero"
Walk into an Acton Academy, and you might think the adults are slacking. No one's at the front of the room. No one's giving lectures. No one's assigning homework.
That's the point.
Founded in 2009, Acton believes every child is a hero on their own journey. Students run their own discussions, set their own goals, and even vote on their own rules. Teachers are called "guides," and their job is to ask questions, not give answers.
The results? Their students typically test several grade levels above their age group (not that weāre counting).
Looking for an Acton Academy near you? Visit actonacademy.org.
Thatās all for today!
ā Charlie (the OpenEd newsletter guy)
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